Moving On After A Break Up, Not To A New You, But For A Better You
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The worst part of the end of a relationship can be the lack of one. The open-endedness and plaguing questions of why and how it all went downhill can keep you up at night. We've all been there, waiting for answers that never came and wasting precious time trying to get that closure from an ex who just wasn't willing to give it.
I've scoured almost all relationship books in hopes to find a way on how to deal with unexpected break up. But really, what I've learned came from experiences. It came from friends who was once left behind, confused and broken-hearted. Whether your break up has come quickly without warning or was a result of a prolonged and bitter struggle, here are some ways on how to move on after a breakup. Move on, or in a more visual and definite in what it means, move forward.
Play it cool. After your break up, friends will flock into your house to be with you, listen to your side and of course get to know what went wrong. This is more likely to happen a few months after a break up. At these times, talking trash about your ex will do no good but harm both to you and your ex. It is important to let go all the negative emotions inside you about the break up, but take some responsibility. It still is best to clear your name of the drama.
Don't play the victim. In the movies, women always tend to be wounded and helpless at the end of the relationship. A study was released by the American Psychological Association, stating that women are twice as likely to develop depression than men. For your own good, be strong and stay positive. Easier said than done? True, but feeling lonely and wishful thinking won't take you a single step away from having a broken heart. Asking for sympathy just makes you more vulnerable. And the more vulnerable you are, the more you are to make bad decisions.
Work on you. In the aftermath of a breakup, we often see ourselves wallowing in our sorrows. Wallowing is okay, in fact needed, but only for a certain period of time. Life has so much to offer, you don't want to miss it, don't you?
Refocus your life. Like any other problems in life... after all the wallowing, you need to refocus your life. Take a deep breath and set your priorities... your family, friends, career and yourself. If you feel you need some counseling, perhaps attend a retreat, do so. It will give you a lot of time to think things over, until you can finally sleep soundly.
Break ups are optional. There are many wonderful relationships out there, and if you would ask them if they have went rough roads at one point or another... majority would say yes. If you really think that your relationship deserves a second chance, there are ways. It's really all up to you to make it happen.
Now a lot of these tips may seem a little facetious and even idealistic, but the key to getting the closure you need is focusing less on the reasons surrounding the split because you may very well never get them. Allow yourself to cry and rely on friends. Allot yourself that time. Just remember how much time we all spend pining after ex-boyfriends that didn't even give us the time of day to offer an explanation. Then think about how much time it takes to find a new guy and build a better relationship. You do the math.
Article Source: Articlelogy.com
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